I went to Wholefoods today.
Observation: It is filled with rich people. The ones that don’t look rich are the ones running errands for the rich people.
I clearly stood out as a errand runner. Especially because I realized after I got home, that one of my boots I was wearing was unzipped, exposing a very turquoise fuzzy sock to all of Wholefoods. The only thing more embarrassing would have been if my other boot was unzipped, exposing a very gray fuzzy sock to all of Wholefoods. Look it’s not my falt there is a fuzzy sock bandit on the loose. It only steals one of the pair of socks leaving me no choice but to wear separate socks. I feel my blog readers judging me right now. Stop. Stop it. Please?
Also I did not “bring my own bags.” Apparently, this is looked down on cause cashier girl was all, “How many bags today,” in a condescending tone and I’m thinking like…I don’t know, you’re the one that bags them. Just see how many you need. I don’t do math. But before I said that, I saw the person behind me with her own grocery bags. Oh I get it, I’m the only customer NOT saving the planet today. You know, I have bigger issues than that like, how am I gonna make it the next 6 days without solid food?!
After I got back home I started putting my groceries away. I took out the grapes and 2 lonely grapes fell out of the bag onto the counter. They were whispering to me at first. Then started screaming at me saying, “EAT ME!!!”
And that is why I cheated today.