So I’m sitting here on the floor, next to boxes and bubble wrap, watching a show called “prison wives” on netflix, with no pants on. Meanwhile, husband is out watching a lot of men in tight pants round the bases. Um, I meant the Yankee game, you sickos.
Let me first back up though. I’m under siege by bubble wrap and boxes because we’re moving. We were actually supposed to have moved into the new place May 30th, but the dude who was in the apartment we’re moving to, decided to just not leave when he said he was going to and not tell anyone. Panic set in when they went to show us the apartment and all his stuff was still there. At that point we had already given our 60 day notice and our lease expired. Luckily our current apartment had not been rented out yet, so we could stay here an extra month and die of heat stroke in this sauna during June. Yep, the heat was STILL ON as of last night…which leads me to why I have no pants on.
Don’t think I hadn’t thought of some revenge plan for that man. Possible egging of the apartment, letting loose a bunch of stink bugs under the door. But considering it will be our apartment, probably not the best revenge plan I’ve ever had.
So where are we moving to? Oh you know, about 3 miles over to the next town. But we will have central AC, 2 bedrooms, and….drum roll please….2 bathrooms! I’m also pumped about living in newer construction, because seriously, this ant farm thing we have going on in the cracks of our wood floors every time it rains, is getting a little ridiculous.
I planned on getting a lot more packing done tonight, but had a major set back when I couldn’t figure out how to assemble the boxes. The instructions looked a lot like origami to me and there were numbers on the sides that were supposed to help but me + math = I don’t do it. So I just ignored the instructions and set to work because how hard could making a box be. I mean, I used to be abe to make a mean origami crane in like, 4th grade. Once I figured out the strange flap on the side with the serrated edge was supposed to be ripped off and made into the top of the box, it was cake. But unfortunately it took me way too long to figure that out and I got sucked into this show on Netflix about prison wives. So about those conjugal visits….awkward. So about those prison wives, don’t be one.
And that guys, is how I got here.